Okay, so I am all alone in my room, doing nothing. I am sitting right here in my bed in the same spot as the other nights, listening music and thinking many things. This is what I do all the nights. I just sit here and enjoy the little time I have alone. I love being alone. I like the feeling that I can be myself without worrying about what people might think about me. I know I should be myself and do not care about others all the time, but I just can't. I like people to like me, so I think I care about what people think too much. Being all by myself let's me rest a little bit about worrying about that.
This year I started a new "ritual" without noticing it. Yes, today was the day I noticed I really had a ritual. All the nights, when I "should" be sleeping, I lay awake in my bed doing various things. From reading a book, being on Facebook or Twitter or listening to music, to just laying down and think.
So all the nights I go to my parents bedroom, say goodbye to each one, give them a kiss and come back to my lovable room. My room is besides my parents bedroom, but between both rooms is their walking closet, so we are not that close.
My door is dark brown and the door lock is silver. In my room there is a king-sized bed, which I love, a little living room, with two little sofas and four little desks that make one, and only one piece of furniture with drawers, not counting the nightstands of course because they are glued to my bed. There are also four lamps, apart from the two big ones, one right above my bed and the other one above the little living room hanging in the ceiling. Surrounding the one above my head there are six "ojos de buey". There are not many things in here because my house is minimalist, so all my house is like that, with little decoration. But describing my house is definitely NOT my ritual, so returning to the story..
All the nights I sit exactly in the same spot in my bed. I sit in the lower right part because that's the only little place in my whole bed that I can have wifi. I can also have wifi in my bathroom or if I sit right in front of my door, but those are not very comfortable places, so I prefer my little spot.
I sit in this same spot for different time each day, from ten minutes to two hours (this is the longest I've been here), depending on my mood and what I am doing.
One thing that I have thought while sitting there, is that I would like time to stop everytime I am here. Time goes by too fast when I am alone! I don't know why and I absolutely do not like it. But time never makes any favor, so it keeps running, and I finally go to sleep very late, making me feel really tired the next day. My parents don't know I do this every night, they would get really mad at me because they always say that I should sleep more, since I am the one that wakes up earlier every day. Just for you to know, I wake up at 4:45 am every day and my sister, who is the second one to wake up, wakes up at 5:40 am. So if they found out that I go to sleep that late because of this, they sure would get mad. But now that I am used to this special time with me, I can't quit it. I do love sleeping, but I always think that I will have enough time for sleeping the next weekend.
I am very happy that I discovered this little ritual, I don't know how it started or why, it simply did. I think it is very good to spend some time with yourself so you can get to know you. Even if you don't like being alone, you should try it one day, maybe you, just like me, really like being alone sometimes...
*extra point*
LOVE IT!
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